Justin Hartley opens up about being a girl dad while giving parenting advice to Drew Barrymore
From overreacting to learning when to stay quiet, Hartley gets honest about what actually works when raising a teenage girl.
Parenting doesn’t come with instructions, and many parents learn as they go through trying different things, making mistakes, and having conversations they didn’t see coming. Celebrity parents face the same challenges as everyone else, despite the spotlight, and deal with the same worries and experiences as all parents.
Recently, actor Justin Hartley shared his insights into being a girl dad during a conversation on The Drew Barrymore Show, offering valuable advice for parents.
Hartley, best known right now for his lead role in Tracker on CBS, has one daughter, Isabella, who’s now 21. Barrymore has two daughters of her own, and when asked for parenting advice, Hartley said: “I’ll give you everything I have.”
One of the first things he mentioned was how quickly kids seem to grow up and develop their own way of communicating. He said it sometimes feels like they’re speaking a different language, with their own slang and references. “Every time something happens, you start to feel like you’re losing touch,” he said, “because they start talking in almost like a foreign language and you’re like, what are you talking about? Is that a verb?” Barrymore laughed in agreement, adding that her daughters speak in slang she genuinely can’t decode.
To maintain a strong connection with kids, Barrymore remembered someone saying it’s important to ask the right questions. She suggested that instead of the usual “How are you?” you might ask a teenager, “What’s it like being a teenager?” Hartley agreed, saying that this approach makes kids feel comfortable rather than defensive. “You’re inquiring about their experience, but not their personal experience necessarily. They don’t feel like you’re prying”, he added.
He also talked about the importance of not overreacting when kids do open up. Hartley admitted that he would sometimes react strongly out of instinct, but realized this could lead to increased anxiety for his child. He compared it to how babies react when they fall; if a parent panics, the baby tends to cry more. The same principle applies to teenagers and even adults: maintaining a cool demeanor helps everyone feel more at ease.
Bridging communication between parents and teens
One of the best ways for parents to keep communication up with teenagers is to ask open-ended questions. These questions encourage kids to think and share more than just a simple “yes” or “no.” Research shows that the best conversations between parents and teens often focus on questions that prompt them to reflect on or relate to their real-life experiences. Parents should create a comfortable environment where teens feel safe expressing themselves rather than just giving short answers.
Additionally, in today’s world of social media, most conversations between parents and teens happen through messaging apps like WhatsApp or Snapchat, which can lead to conversations that focus only on everyday things like pick-up times or school reminders. To build a stronger connection, parents should try to go beyond these simple chats. If a teenager only receives practical messages, they are less likely to share their thoughts and feelings about what’s really important to them.
It’s also important for parents to manage their emotions when teens share difficult issues. Old-school parenting styles may not work well anymore. When a teenager opens up about something serious, a calm response from a parent helps them feel that it’s okay to be honest. This doesn’t mean there won’t be any consequences for their actions, but it helps both of them tackle things calmly together. When teens know they can talk about anything without fear, they’re more likely to keep coming back to their parents for support.
